Eight years ago or so, I never dreamt I would be writing a post for you on tips for curating a calm home. My home was the farthest thing from calm! But a calm home was what I really wanted, it became a priority for me, and I committed to find a way.
And guess what? Well … it is still probably not the calmest home out there. But it is calmer. And I feel calm and in control.
So as I keep trucking with my week of posts celebrating my Brand New Quiet Time Club, I thought it a great time to share with you five of the things that I do to make my home a calmer space.
Of course, the biggest piece of all has been finding a way to feel calm on the inside, even when there is wildness blustering all around me in the form of tiny humans. These tips below help with this, as well as help to nurture a calm physical home.
5 Things that Make a Calm Home
A Daily Quiet Time and Strong Rhythm
If you have been hanging around with me for the week, you no doubt have heard me talk about Quiet Time. It truly is the cornerstone to our days. And I already shared a blog post this week with you on establishing a rhythm. However, I wanted to briefly touch on those things now in regards to how they relate to us, the grown ups.
When we have a strong rhythm to our days, we can add in all of the things that we need to do within a week and make those things flow naturally and consistently. Perhaps Mondays will be for meal planning, Tuesdays for vacuuming, and so on. When we have a flow or rhythm to our weeks, we feel calmer as well. We know we will have the time to do all that we need to do.
This is another reason why Quiet Time is crucial. We have an hour a day to rest and recharge, or on days when we need it, that time can be used for ploughing through a to-do list, or clearing out a closet. Anything that feels pressing, or that is important to us, has a space in our day to happen.
This definitely helps to make a home calmer.
Go to your Child
This is a super simple switch to make that requires a surprising amount of will power to actually accomplish, or at least it did for me. I used to be a huge “hollerer” – I have never been a yeller, but I would always holler for my children when I needed them, when it was time for us to go somewhere, or when it was time for dinner.
This hollering was often responded to with hollering back: “Just a minute!” “But, I am in the middle of something!” “I don’t want to go!” and so on. Definitely not calming.
Now, I {try really hard to} go to my children. When it is time for dinner, I will walk over to where they are playing, sit down for a minute to hear all that they excitedly want to share with me, and then tell them that it is time for dinner. More times than not they are very happy to take my hand and join me at the table.
This simple switch has increased our connection, has allowed my children to feel important and valued, and has reduced a whole lot of hollering back and forth.
Keep a Running to Do List
If you are anything like me, you have a lot going on inside your head at any moment in time. Before I started to keep a running to-do list, I would very often feel flustered and distracted and needing to step away from whatever I was currently doing to “do something” real quick. Not surprisingly, this did not make me feel calm.
Not only that, it was really having an impact on my days with my children. We would be in the middle of engaging in an activity, playtime, or anything and then I would feel the need to pop up to go do something. You can be assured that as soon as my phone came out to send a quick email, those little ones of mine were right at my side, no longer engaged in their activities, and wondering what I was up to.
Now, I have a little journal that I keep with me. When I think of something pressing that I worry I might forget, I just jot it down. Two seconds – if that – no one is interrupted and we maintain our calm, engaged activities.
It serves the same purpose as actually accomplishing the task, as I know once it is on my to-do list it can leave my mind. I know I have time etched out in my rhythm to accomplish my list each day, in half the time it would take me with all of my little helpers.
Have a Tidy Up Time Each Day
I like to think of myself as a creative person and a rather free-spirit. This side of me always felt that I should be embracing the mess in my home. After all, children engaged in purposeful play is often very messy, creative building projects are certainly messy, and crafts and art activities are bound to make a mess.
But watching a big mess occur before my eyes stressed me out. It did not make me feel calm, even though I wanted the deep play and purposeful projects to happen, without my children worrying about making a mess as they worked.
The solution that has worked for me is carving out a period of time every afternoon for cleaning up. It is that simple! Just like adding things to me to-do list freed my mind of worrying about all I had to do, knowing we had a clean up time each day freed my mind from worrying about the mess.
Each afternoon, typically after Quiet Time, but if not, always before bed, we have a big, family, clean up time. We all work together and get everything put away. Doing this every day makes sure the messes never get too large, and it is amazing what seeing a space clean and tidy, even if only for a little while each day, does for my mental health.
Sleep
My final tip for you, sweet Mama, or Daddy, or Grandma, or Caregiver, or anyone wishing to make a calm home for your little ones, is to not underestimate the importance of sleep.
Get those little ones to bed nice and early. A long, good sleep does wonders for a child. And guess what? The same goes for you.
I used to stay up real late working on this blog of mine. I love writing in this space and sharing my activities and thoughts with you. It is an important outlet for me and something I am very passionate about! But now, I am mindful of not getting carried away with my writing and projects. I make sure I get to bed with plenty of time to read and turn those lights out in very good time.
When I have gotten myself to bed early, I find it much easier to handle those late night wake ups and those early morning wake ups, too. Let’s face it, children don’t make it easy to get a goodnights sleep, so it is important we help ourselves as much as we can by getting to bed in good time.
A wonderful way to help us to feel calm, is to be rested.
And there you have them, my friend. My five tips for helping to cultivate a calm home. I hope one or two resonate with you. Please let me know what helps YOU to feel calm, or what has helped your home become a calmer place by leaving a comment below. I am always looking for tips to help us continue to move in the right direction.
Thank you so much for reading.
xo
Sarah
P.S. Want some support making your home a calm, blissful haven? Join my Quiet Time Club!
Becksi says
What a terrific article. I am definitely going to try the “go to your Child” trick. Also, I think a change of sleeping patterns may be in order.
I am glad I clicked this email link today.
Sarah says
Thank you, Becksi! I am happy this post was helpful to you. Good luck on the change of sleeping patterns! The sleep one is something I am always seeking to improve. Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment. xo
Alycia says
This is exactly what I needed to read! I love the concept of “Going to your children” instead of hollering!
Sarah says
Oh I am so happy this post resonated with you, Alycia. Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment! xo
Stacey Borge says
This was great! Although most of these concepts weren’t brand new to me, it refreshed my perspective on just how important the “little things” are, and that they add up to make a difference. I also felt so validated when you brought up that having a tidy space does wonders for your mental health ~ I’m not alone!!!! Lol. I love letting them get messy and wild…. But I also like to clean up after…
Thanks for this post!
Sarah says
Oh, I love that thought you shared – all these seemingly ‘little things’ truly do add up to make a difference! I am so happy some of these ideas were helpful for you, Stacey! Thank you for taking the time to comment. xo
Marivic says
This is what I need to have a calm home! I relaized I am a hollerer myself. Yes, i need to go to my child and stop yelling. Also, I need to improve our sleeping pattern. Thank you so much, Sarah.
Sarah says
I am so happy this blog post and some of my ideas resonated with you Marivic! Good luck, my friend – keep me posted!